Gods are selfish beings who fly around in little red capes and don't share their power with mankind.

I saw Superman Returns at a kind of late show on opening night, which I initially blamed for part of my displeasure with it, but on further reflection I've just decided that it really isn't a good movie after all.

I have lots of complaints. Yeah, it's too long, and kind of slow. But that's ok, I've liked lots of movies in the past that were too long and some of them have even been ridiculously slow (think Unbreakable.) The key problem is that nothing really happens and none of the characters are interesting. Sure, at 2.5 hours the movie drags on too long. But even at 1.5 hours I'm not sure I would have liked it. It just would have been more fun to watch the neat action and effects without sitting for as long.

I could be a big geek and go off about all the ways this movie doesn't measure up. I could talk about all the various different characters and how they could have been better or more interesting. But that doesn't turn out to be helpful, because I'd just be enumerating all the parts of the movie. This movie really hit a bad chord with me, and when I start going on it it's hard to stop.

I think it's best if I just avoid getting going on it.

For the record, there are some good things. I thought the introductory action sequence where Superman rescues the plane was pretty good (minus that Lois should have multiple fractures and head traumas by the end.) I especially liked the scene where Lois first sees Superman racing by the airplane window. Also, the movie is gorgeous, but that's also one of it's downfalls. There's only so many times you can show a pretty shot of superman hovering up in the sky before it gets old and stale, and this movie passes that point early on.

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